Saturday, April 5, 2014

The Tantrum

Whether you have children, know children or been a child yourself, we've all seen a child loose it with a full blown temper tantrum. Feet stomping, breath holding all out war of disobedience. It just so happens that I have children, so yes, I have witnessed this for myself.

I have one child, in whom keeping her anonymity shall go nameless, wink, wink. known for her epic tantrums. I love both of my kids, for real, I think it's a law that I have to or something. Anybody who has been coming to St. Paul's for awhile and having heard my Father's day message a few years back knows my son lead me back to Christ. Not to be outdone by her brother, my daughter is responsible for showing me a lot as well.

I honestly think God meant for our children to learn from us, so that in turn they mirror our behavior. Seeing ourselves in them, the good and bad, one can have a new self awareness, enough to know, half the reason you have to punish them is your fault. If your honest enough to admit it, that kind of awareness is life changing. For all parties involved.

My daughter developed this habit of throwing a big emotional tantrum to avoid being corrected. Right in the middle of me asking her for the umpteenth time not to do something, she would tear up and demand that I hug her. Keep in mind, she's not hurt, I wasn't rude or over exhaustively shouting at her. She would just start hollering I stop correcting her and hug her. I'm standing right next to her, and she would repeat over and over I want you, I want you. Broken as I was over her plea for my hugging her, I stood firm. I'm the dad, this is my job, she cant stop me or alter how she's going to be reprimanded.

I would comfort her as best as I could while maintaining as much control as I could. I'm right here, let's calm down, lets do what I ask, an I'll hug you as much as you want, I would respond. I just want you, was her answer. Now if this looks bad, keep in mind I went about many different ways to nip these tantrums in the bud, and I never punished her over the tantrums themselves.

Delivering mail, sitting in my truck affords me plenty of quiet time. This as been both good and bad. Good in that I get to spend a lot of time driving and pondering scripture, life, love and family. Bad is when any one of the above starts to take a nose dive, and I have no one in the truck to talk to. There are times when those dives accelerate into crashes, I get one of those melt downs. I have this habit, everyday before I hit the street to deliver, I say a little prayer. Nothing major, just a tiny little prayer like you might hear before a meal. I remember this one week, nothing was going right, it was one little thing after another. Well, I felt you know instead of this little stock prayer that I do I'm just going to go all out with a plea to God.

Thank you God for the work before me.
I pray that I can deliver it quickly, safely, accurately
and as painlessly as humanly possible.
I know I ask you for a lot, and you have never
denied me anything you felt good for me.
I know you watch over me because I've felt you.
I've felt your presence. Please help me. Help me
have the faith I should. Help me straighten my
doctrine. Help me I ask, though I know you are there, I need you.
Not in a little sign, I need you. I don't want a fleeting moment, I want you.
Touch me , move me. I want you, if nothing else, I want you. I just want you.

For those honest enough to admit they see the good and bad they've put in their children, it will change their life's. We've all done things we need to be reprimanded for. We all have lessons to learn, things to make amends to. Sometimes in the emotional chaos of it all, sometimes being touched by the one we love makes all the difference in the world. Even, when we're in the wrong and potentially underserving. It doesn't make the wrong we do right. It's just the nature of a really good Father.

P.S. If you like what you read Please Share, Multimedia and social networking are great ways to spread the faith amongst others. Keep the Conversation going.


  1. What a great post, Dave! You always make me think. We're so lucky to have you and your great family as part of our church!

  2. Honestly couldn't do it without them. Its because God as blessed me so, they help keep me straight.